I have been thinking about what I wanted to make my post about this week and after some interesting questions I have gotten this week I wanted to discuss boundaries. Jon and I put a section of our life out for the world to see. Always remember the things you know about someone is only what they want you to know. Do not expect to know the whole situation. We post pictures and information about specific punishments, but that is only a fraction of the punishments that go on around here. We also do not give all the details on what was done to earn the punishment.
Punishments are just that, they are not for pleasure. While we do enjoy photo sharing we do not like sharing intimate details of every aspect of our life.
What I mean by all of this is our “vanilla” life. Jon has already said he has a job in the Military. I say I work from home. What I do as my job I can not really say too much. I work in a field where I have a lot of customers and if the two lives combined it would make for a complex situation.
One part that I will go into is that I am opening a fetish line of products soon. We are looking for testers of some of the products, but more on that another day. The rest of what I do is personal to me.
This is not just a problem I have faced. I see people all the time being outed to others who say what their name really is, where they live, what they do for a job. While I know this information about a lot of my spanko friends and they know mine you must keep it private.
While I don’t always agree some do this outside of the bounds of their relationships and marriages. As adults we have the right to make decisions and lead the life we want. But this is a private sensative subject and should be treated as such.
Here are a few rules I like to follow and ask the people whom I spank to follow. This pertains to both the spanker and spankee
1. Don’t give out anyone’s real name without their approval. That could be as simple as their first name. Never give it out, only call them by their nickname or screen name.
2. Don’t tell anyone where the other person lives. There are many freaks out there and you don’t want anything happening to the other person. Some will say their state or general location, never give out addresses, specific cities or other details.
3. Don’t tell anyone what job the individuals hold. While we would like to think that adults can do as they please, well thats not the case. Some are in jobs that could be destroyed if the information is leaked. I have seen instances where a spankee gets mad that a spanker can’t meet with her and sent pictures and letters to the Spanker’s office.
4. Why you get punished is your story to tell. The Spanker should never say why the spankee was being punished. Punishments are personal and some hold deep emotional baggage with them. No one wants to have their secrets displayed for everyone to see. If the spankee agrees then that information can be shared.
5. If you do not have contact with the spankee and want to write a story or post about a specific spanking, change the names. Never give out their username, former names, etc.
6. Don’t give out information until you know someone. It is very easy to trace emails, phone numbers and more. Do NOT ever share any personal information until you are fully comfortable with the individuals involved.
7. Try and keep as many family details private as possible. Admit to what you need to but never share too much. Your spouse, kids, siblings and parents would appreciate the crazies not being able to contact them.
Just always keep in mind that we are humans too, we have lives outside the kink (well most of us do.) and we do not want to combine those. And always play safe everytime and every way!!!