How to Initiate Conversations

Hey Spankos!

One thing I have found interesting in the spanking community, specifically on boards, is how people initiate conversations. I get a ton of messages from others and I love receiving them. There is nothing I enjoy more then getting to know others in the community. I want to start out by saying this is in no way trying and stop those from sending me a message! I just want to go over some things I have experienced, and hopefully this will help you be a little more successful in reaching out to others!

A lot of this is more specific to approaching a woman but there are things to keep in mind with men too! I am not saying this pertains to everyone, this is just things that I have seen myself and my personal feelings! I am sure some share it and some don’t!

  1. Do not start off with showing your penis! More and more are only into spanking for what it is…spanking. They do not want sex and quiet frankly do not care how big your junk is. With me personally, I think a penis as well as a vagina, are just nasty and weird. And honestly…..they all look the same.
  2. Do not be overly confident. I automatically ignore anyone who just comes right out and boasts about their “successes.” I don’t care how much you have done and to who, I care about what happens between us, rather it be friendship or spanking relationship!
  3. Have confidence. Yes I know just said not to be too confident, but you need to be confident when you approach someone. There is a huge difference. You want to be confident in who you are and what your looking for!
  4. Don’t lie…..Just DON’T!!!
  5. Don’t jump straight to the action. I will delete your message if it only contains what you want to do to me. Introduce yourself. What is your name, what do you enjoy, where are you, what are some hobbies? Anything is better then….”come on over I want to beat your ass.” Okay fine but I get my turn next and guess what….only one of us will be hurting!
  6. Read the profile. Are they monogamous? A Switch? A Top? Do a little research before you reach out. It will save a lot of embarrassment and time!
  7. Don’t be desperate. I understand when your looking for something and you really want or need it. But do not just jump in begging someone, or saying you really need something. We all understand that need. But you want to get to know someone. You do not want to be taken advantage of. Also I want to know that you give a damn who I am and not just looking for your good time. I want to make sure that you care as much as I do!
  8. Show respect! If their profile asks you to contact their Daddy, Top, Master, Mommy, etc. before contacting them. Then take the time and do that. Show that you care to get to know the person!
  9. Just because you get a reply does not mean your friends or in a relationship! It just means that the door is open for communication! Jumping too fast to conclusions will get that door slammed so fast in your face!
  10. Ask questions! You want to know something? Ask! Makes me feel like you care enough to know what I do, think, etc. Not just how I can benefit you!

I am sure I could go all day but I hope some of these tips help you out in your quest! As I said I am always up for conversation and will help in any way I can so please feel free to look me up on fetlife under MrsWelts (I got a new account). Or email me at!

I am always willing to help, just remember….no pee pee pictures! :)

Till Later!


Mrs Welts

What Do You Fear?

Hey Spankos!

I have a question for everyone. What do you fear? This is a question that I ask anyone who I take on a discipline relationship with. Not to be sadistic but it is an important realization that a spanko can come to.

Now I am sure we all have fears. For instance, I am terrified of heights, you will never see me ride a zip line or sky dive! I have an irrational fear of talking to people I don’t know on the phone. Thats just some of the starters! But we are not here to talk about the vanilla world so lets get down to basics.

What are you afraid of spanking wise? I want to stop here and say if you tell me you are afraid of a person, please get out of that situation. If you are afraid for your personal safety then I don’t care what side of this lifestyle you fall under, even the most dominate person should have your best interest at heart. If you tell me you are afraid of the person or punishment because you physically get hurt. That is not a spanking that is abuse and please get help. We have limits for a reason and they should always be known and respected.

Now it is okay to be afraid to upset someone, it is okay to fear the spanking. It might be an implement you fear, the pain, the disappointment? What is it?

I will start off! I don’t fear pain. I live in pain, there has yet to be a spanker who has made me fear the pain I will receive. Honestly, if you go long enough with me I go into sub space and just get the best sleep ever. If you don’t go hard enough I don’t feel it a hour or two later! Pain is just a sensation to me. I have always been in more pain and I know it passes.

I am motivated by the fear of upsetting someone I care about. For me to allow you to punish me, I have to care about you and what you think. So I will feel bad if I let you down. This is a two way street though. The spanker has to give a damn for why they are punishing you! If you don’t care enough that I let you down then quiet frankly I don’t care enough to do what you ask!!

Now lets talk about my big fear! Belts! I know this will surprise most of you since I do love leather. This goes back a long way, and for me to actually fear it a lot has to be in place. This was always the best way to get to me. I have always been privileged to have a lot of tools at my disposal. But honestly nothing got to be as fast as a belt. In the relationship that this became a staple for me, he would spank me with anything else under the sun, but would never take his belt off to me unless I really deserved it. What this allowed is me to have a constant reminder that he is paying attention to what I am doing. It gave him a constant reminder every time he took his clothes on and off his commitment to me. It gave me the comfort of knowing that he paid attention to everything I did and judged everything individually and didn’t just start spanking me. It also allowed me to know exactly where his limits and my limits were.

Now I can relate my fear and interest in belts back to my upbringing because that is what my dad used, and probably has something to do with that. Though I try and not base my life now on what happened then.

Over the years the belt has became just another toy and honestly that is the biggest disservice to me. It does me no good if it is just brought out for any reason.

I bring this up because I want you to think about what you fear and why! What can you do to help yourself? If you want to do better you really should look about an implement, position, etc that you really fear. That should be saved for the real punishments you need.

I know personally I need to re-evaluate the use to the belt in our house. I brought straps for this very reason. So I have my leather but I don’t have to use that specific piece of equipment until it is warranted.

I will go over why I don’t feel pain and more information about pain thresholds and improving them in a later post!

What do you fear? What motivates you to do better?

Till Next Time!

Mrs Welts

Homecoming and Our Store

Hey Spankos!

So as Jon said we have moved back to my home! I must say the last 6 months have been amazing. You don’t realize how much you miss somewhere until you come back! I have been spending the last few months with my family. We were gone a long time and I missed a lot, I refuse to miss anything else!

For the most part I left the lifestyle a year ago. I have never been one to be on the websites but for the sake of Jon I was. I started to really realize why I did not like that aspect and needed to get out for my own sanity. That is all a whole long story for another day.

After I did that I posted less and less on here. I will admit I have missed a lot of people and am looking forward to reconnecting with them and connecting with new people.

I am not sure how much content you will see of us spanking other people. We moved to Middle Tennessee. I come from a very well known family in the area, and quiet frankly over most of the state. I can not walk into any place here without being recognized for the work one or both my parents have done. This is both a blessing and a curse let me tell you!

Before I got married I had a lot of play partners in the area, most knew my parents, some were even their friends. I played with fire and I will admit that. So I am hesitant to get back into that aspect now that I am back here. I have gotten a few messages about setting up sessions! I promise it is nothing personal. We just have to be very very careful.

I have decided to dust off all the work I had started for our fetish store! I put it away a year ago just because I did not know how far I wanted to go any more. Honestly, at one point I was ready to never hear the word spanking again!

So coming this summer you will be able to come into our world a little more! You will be able to find so much fetish gear with things for all aspects of this lifestyle we love. Best part of all, they will all be available at a reasonable price code. Our initial launch will see various parts of our panties line as well as our colorful and novelty straps! Hot pink metallic strap anyone? Male panties that look all girly and frilly but have the proper “fit” for the man in your life? We will have that too! Eventually we will even have adult baby gear including a play mat with overhead toy bar.

We will be giving away a ton of samples starting in the Spring for those that want to be our testers! I still have a list of those interested and will be in contact! If you haven’t contacted me, please do so, would love to have you in the sample pool!

Anyways that is what is going on with me! Hope it makes some sense!

Love you all!

Mrs Welts

10 Spanking Facts–With Mrs. Welts

Hey Spankos!

I have gone back and forth with the idea of if I am coming back in to the “lifestyle” for a few weeks now. I am not for sure what the future holds but I thought I would play around and do something a little different. Most do not know a lot about me so I am going to just give a few details!

Here are 10 facts about me that have to do with spanking.

  1. I spanked my best friend/girlfriend at our school on more then one occasion. During the school hours, in the bathrooms which had no doors and not much sound proofing!
  2. Oldest person that has spanked me? 85, I was 19. The oldest person I have spanked? 78, I was 18. So don’t be judgmental on age! If they are legal, keep an open mind!
  3. Nearly everyone in my school knew I was a spanko. I was even interviewed by multiple teachers, principals, and school counselors. Never gave up details.
  4. One of the most popular girls in school found a note I left by accident that was from my (much older) boyfriend, in it described a complete punishment session he was going to administer. (Hence how #3 happened)
  5. When I was in high school I dated and was engaged to a Cop. Even going as far as being at the alter, when I was 18. Thankfully a friend stopped it. But I spent a lot of nights with him. We had a 100% domestic discipline lifestyle. I was 15….he was not! My parents never knew about him for 3 years. Still don’t!
  6. While dating #5 I was spanking others and being spanked by others. Spent nearly every weekend with my best friend who I spanked frequently including multiple times when her Dad was home. It ultimately cost us our friendship. I still miss her.
  7. Weirdest place I have been spanked would be in a store parking lot.
  8. I have only cried during 3 spankings.
  9. My parents deep down knew the truth at an early age. Too much happened, they never confronted me. Not even when they found a paddle and wooden spoon in my luggage after a weekend at my friend’s.
  10. I have been spanked, consensual of course, by a few of my parents friends, and they don’t know!

I probably could come up with a ton more but here are a few to get you started!! A lot of these will be a surprise to even Jon! What is your biggest, funniest, strangest, etc. spanking fact? Would love to hear them!


Until next time Spankos!

Mrs Welts


Hi friends I thought I would share with you some classic spanking pictures that I found on the internet that remind me of to the pictures that I looked at when I was first getting into spanking and trying to figure out what it was all about! I’m sure a lot of you can relate and have seen most of these pictures at one time or another.

First up are the classic pictures from Nu West called the “Debbie series”.



What’s special about these pictures is the fact that Debbie is actually getting spanked by her own mother Margo.



These pictures are from the very early 1980’s with the video being shot on 8 mm.


Arguably the best things about these classic pictures are the reactions that are produced by Debbie and the no-nonsense look of mother spanking her.

For fans of M/M spanking, I thought I would include a classic picture of a father giving his son a good old fashioned hairbrush spanking!

Obviously another good picture of genuine reactions! Hope you all have an awesome weekend and look forward to seeing you all again soon! Happy spankings!

Movies and Spanking

After sharing with you one of my favorite spanking scenes in a movie which first introduced me to this world, I thought I would showcase some more spanking scenes in movies.

This is definitely not a complete list, as there are probably hundreds of spanking scenes throughout the history of cinema, but I thought I would share some of my personal favorites, and my least favorites and why.

First up, and probably one of the most famous spanking scene in cinema is the spanking scene with John Wayne and Maureen O’hara in Mclintock! Those of you haven’t seen it should know that there are actually twos spanking scenes in one movie. The first one was with Patrick Wayne, John Wayne’s real-life son, spanking his future wife played by Stephanie Powers.


Patrick Wayne spanking Stephanie Powers in Mclintock! (1968)

But obviously, the best scene is when John Wayne spanks Maureen O’hara in her underthings in front of the entire town.


John Wayne dishing out discipline with a Coal Shovel in Mclintock! (1968)

Although I personally find it quite comical that a coal shovel was used as a implement in both scenes, something that I would probably never think about using, although as you can see from the reactions, it seems pretty effective! The movie was actually pretty fun and entertaining, and I still watch it occasionally just for a good laugh. Ironically enough, John Wayne stars in several other movies that had spanking scene them, including True Grit, and Donovan’s Reef.

The next movie I’m sure most people in the 21st Century are familiar with, and that is the movie Secretary. The movie stars James Spader and Maggie Gyllenhaal as a secretary who loses her way and has trouble coping with self harm issues. She gets a job as a secretary under James Spader who plays a lawyer, who ends up using Dominance and submission as a way of showing Maggie’s character a better way of coping with her issues.


Maggie Gyllenhaal getting spanked in Secretary (2002)

Now, most spankings in mainstream movies don’t necessarily capture the essence of a real spanking, and this movie is no exception. I mean, seriously how can you spank somebody and make it look like you’re playing tennis or ping pong with the ridiculous forehand and backhand motion? Anyways, the movie is pretty decent, however, I do have several issues with it. This movie, along with several others (The Killer Inside Me for example) portrays being a spanko/kinkster as abnormal, and it makes us look like we all have some sort of mental issue, or damaged psyche that explains why we partake in this type of lifestyle. Obviously the truth is far from that, and if you really want to talk about what’s normal and abnormal, I think we (spankos) are more normal than most people because of the fact that we accept our fetishes, and kinks, and what turns us on, sexual or not, instead of hiding and suppressing those feelings most vanilla people do.

Another movie with a spanking scene in it that I thought was fairly well done was the movie A Dangerous Method. Now I’ll be honest I didn’t actually watch the movie I just watched the spanking scene, however I thought the spanking you see had some pretty decent reaction shots from Kiera Knightly who is famous for the Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy. The problem I had with it? It was a typical mainstream movie-spanking. It was too short, and didn’t capture the real essence of a spanking.


Kiera Knightly in A Dangerous Method (2011)

The last, and definitely least, of my favorite spanking scenes in a movie has to obviously come from Fifty Shades of Grey. First off, I’ve never seen a movie cast so poorly in terms of picking an actor and actress with such terrible on screen chemistry. Each and every scene with them felt so forced and unnatural and after a while the movie lost all sense of magic an escape from reality. After reading the book I was particularly excited to see how the spanking scene from the book would be portrayed on film, I was sadly very disappointed with the outcome. I mean, really…3 swats? The whole scene was awkward and unnatural.


The dud of a spanking scene in Fifty Shades of Grey (2015)

There was a few good moments in the movie, however, it should not be advertised as a movie by or for people in the spanking or BDSM community. It was a romantic drama and let’s leave it at that.

So how about it spanko world? What was your favorite or least favorite spanking in a mainstream movie? Go ahead and leave a comment, and tell us your thoughts! In the meantime, enjoy the rest your week and happy spankings!

Rare Spanking Pics


Miss J actually being spanked by Lady D??? (Photo credit:

Hi friends! Just checking in and show you this rare picture I found while browsing Tumblr. It’s a vintage pic (circa 2001) from showing the former matriarch and queen Spanker of RSN Miss J, being placed in timeout after being paddled by the equally beautiful and strict Lady D!

I know both ladies have long since retired from the spanking limelight, but these classic pics remind me of the days I first started watching and enjoying spanking videos, and RSN was by far the best content of the time and still great today! The realism and no nonsense of their videos can’t be touched by many companies out there, even today.

Hope you all are enjoying the New Year! Stay warm out there and keep those bottoms toasty!